Improve Communication With Your Partner Using this Simple Exercise

August 08, 2022

Improve Communication With Your Partner Using this Simple Exercise

I wanted to follow up on a previous post about getting ‘stuck in the courtroom’. A reader posed the question on Facebook and asked for examples of how to improve communication and avoid getting stuck in their marriage.

Implement this simple exercise

It’s just three simple sentences.

  1. “When _________.” 
  2. “I feel __________. 
  3. “I want __________.” 

How to use it in action:

Speak your feelings and wants very clearly. For example:

When you said you’d get home at five and you came home at eight, I felt angry, disrespected and overlooked. I want your words and actions to match so that we can build trust.

This seems so simple, but yet it can be very difficult without practice. Be sure for your feel statement that you only use adjectives – either a single word or no more than two or maybe three words. For your want, it should be a short sentence that gets right to the point of what it is that you want to be different in the future.

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KIM BOWEN is a licensed professional counselor who offers relationship therapy through her company, The Marriage Place. Her blogs and newsletters have been featured in various publications

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