Feeling “Stuck” In Your Marriage? Here’s How to Get Out

July 19, 2022

How Marriages Get Stuck

I want to talk to you today about ways I see that marriages get stuck. Of course, all of us can get into patterns and into cycles, but some of the more common ones include, what I call “being in the courthouse.” Talking about who’s right and who’s wrong. Or somebody is being critical and the other one is getting defensive. Both of these things share a commonality – the both focus on what the other person is doing, whether it be right or wrong. 

Put The Spotlight On Yourself

Shift your focus off of what your spouse is doing and instead put the spotlight on you. In what areas could you be doing better in the relationship? Change the only thing you can control – yourself and your behavior. 

Communicate and Take Responsibility

And so as you think about trying to change this, think about sharing what it is you’re thinking about. What it is you’re feeling. Take responsibility for your own emotions. By doing this, it gives the other person a less offensive posture. Hope this helps. 

How healthy is your marriage?

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KIM BOWEN is a licensed professional counselor who offers relationship therapy through her company, The Marriage Place. Her blogs and newsletters have been featured in various publications

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