Back in the early years of my marriage, I wanted my spouse to change. Not everything, just a few things that drove me crazy. They say you can’t change others and while technically, that is true, you might be surprised to find you have more power than you think to change other people.
Here is the secret: to change someone else you have to first be willing to change something YOU are doing. Think about it for a second. Most of us get upset and demand, complain or criticize our spouse for not changing. If demanding, complaining or criticizing worked, you wouldn’t need this article. I tried those things for years and nothing was getting better in my marriage. In fact, things were getting much worse. But here is how I changed one thing I was doing and it really did change my husband’s behavior.
Dealing With MILs – Infographic.
When you get married to your partner, you inherit a new extension to your family in the form of your in-laws.
For the majority, this is a wonderful experience and a welcome addition to your life. You are gaining a wider family unit, one that will care for you hugely and vice-versa.
However, there are some instances where in-laws and specifically Mother-in-laws (MILs) can cause issues. It’s usually due to them being overprotective about their son or daughter being “lost” to another individual and might stem from the fact that they feel their position as the chief carer is now in danger. They fear being forgotten and bypassed for the partner and simply abhor the thought of sharing their offspring with another human.
Some MILs might not even be aware that they’re behaving in this way but it can be hugely upsetting for the new partner involved and cause great issues for them personally and in their relationship. Interfering MILs sometimes also like to rear their heads when grandchildren arrive; they feel their experience of nurturing a family gives them the right to heavily immerse themselves into the new child’s upbringing. Of course, they do have a role in this new addition. They are the grandparent after all, but it’s how they choose to deal with this is the crux of the matter. They can be supporting and loving and offer advice and help when it’s needed but the problems happen when they interfere and criticize unnecessarily.
It can be a difficult situation to fix but it is definitely common! The people at Loyes Diamonds have put together this infographic which hopefully deals with some of the concerns and offers some solutions to those experiencing (or creating) MIL problems.